The following chapter is from a collection of personal short stories that occurred from 2008-2010. Leave a critique.
28 Hues of Colorblindness
The campus was barren of human interaction. It is a desolation that is quite common between the end of the spring session, marked by graduation, and the start of the first summer session. Nevertheless, there is a small reserve troop of dedicated students during this time called the “maymester”. But in the evenings, when I like to run the campus, it was inhabited.
I enjoy running, but it often pains me something fierce. I am an irregular person in more ways than one and I am especially inconsistent in exercise. However, I love evening jogs at Texas State, especially when it is void of life. It was as if the emptiness is motivation for me to exercise, to create commotion something in the vast silence.
The jog up the steps to Old Main was always a rough encounter. The path was littered with few flat surfaces and it’s default surface was staircases. when I reached the collegiate summit atop the hill where the landmark building stood, I sat myself down on a flowerbed’s edge.
Heart pounding. Lungs collapsing and expanding rapidly. I rocked myself and changed positions to distract myself from the sharp pains of a three mile jog. Old Main was standing as a sentry above the brick bordered flower beds that I struggled upon. Its red-roofed victorian gothic self remaining alive after all these years unmoved, yet on the wane, I am sure. I had often pondered the lives that had trespassed on its guarding grounds over the years since it had be constructed in 1908. What souls have crossed between this space onto something greater? Onto something worse? Old Main connected the souls together in an intangible yet physical way.
Ooohhhh crraappp (wheez...breath...wheez).
I usually say something along those lines when I am recovering from jogging pains. Holly had told me a couple of tricks for getting rid of pains in my sides when I run. She is a great runner and can easily beat most people in a cross country race - even though she usually doesn’t. I tried a couple of the tricks but they never work to the effect I think that they should. Laying my wheezing body on the flower bed rim, my face pointed to the sky and my lungs reduced themselves from frantic effort to a more healthy rhythm.
The clouds were burning. They were lofty ships that have been inflamed from a battle that the sky had with the sun. A battle who’s victor changes day to day on the onset of each sunset. They were glowing with warm hue.
It feels silly discussing clouds. It’s hippie-like, isn’t it? or even seen as childish or what lovers do when they are rolling around in some majestic Etruscan field or something, I wouldn’t know. Additionally, I have never been a fan of cloud photography, always considering it to be unimaginative or unoriginal. My photographs could never capture the beauty of a sunset, so why try? If these visible floating masses of condensed water vapor were ultimately non-photogenic, then what motivation do I have to seek them out. Additionally, the creativity of the floating vessel portrait is heavily tied to the originality of the cloud, it seems like one doesn’t spin an unique perspective but captures an naturally unique object. Of course I am speaking from the utility of a photographer and also from my abilities as a photographer to capture clouds.
Nevertheless, the sunset was amazing. The kind that is “off the charts” remarkable.
• • •
A week or so later, Natty and I were discussing the grand topic of life while sitting on a parking stop behind the Christian Science Reading Room. We had been there for sometime watching the sun slowly win another battle against the armies of the cloud. Thin wispy layers of cirrus clouds were fanned out across the blue canvas and they glowed like torches.
She pointed to the sky in mid conversation to be sure that I am aware of the beauty that was unfolding on the aerial battlefront. That kind of interruption happens often, she gets really excited about moments or caterpillars or other bugs or babies and can’t hold her curiosity and joy in.
Natty: That’s so beautiful.
Jake: (reflective and slow) Yes, yes it is. This is my favorite time of day.
Natty: (lovely excitement) Mine too! I love how you can see the colors contrasting against each other, like that tree in front of the blue sky.Jake stares at the contrasting tree for a second, quietly.
Jake: Most times I forget to notice the contrast of the sunset I guess its because I am ‘too’ busy. (Pause) Or maybe because I am colorblind I don’t care so much about it. Those are my favorite kinds of clouds, though.
Natty: What kind are they?
Jake: Stratus or something. I am sure thats not the right word. I only know two cloud types: stratus and columbus - like christopher. (a silly smile to accompany a silly pun)A pause between the two as they pay more attention to the contrasting hues.
Jake: (sudden excitement) Natty! I forgot to tell you!
Natty: Oh goodness. Do tell.
Jake: The other day, it sounds crazy but I swear it happened.
Natty: Okay, try me. I am sure it isn’t crazy.
Jake: I swear, for five minutes or so...(pause)...I wasn’t colorblind
Natty: Really?
Jake: Yeah, I was watching a sunset like this up on campus and I was laying down on the rim of a flowerbed staring up at a cloud. It was on fire with colors. I could see the colors, all of them!
Natty: That. Is. Amazing.
Jake: I know! (commences rant) One side of the cloud was in flames. Reds, oranges, greens - no wait I don’t know if there were greens–I’m new at this– golden and awesome is what it was. Layers of warm colors. (Breath) The other side of this cloud was blue and cool. Cool with dark blues and Phoenician purples and…well, you know those ice-pops that were awesome when we were kids?
Natty: Of course!
Jake: A big part of the cloud was ice-pop blue and stood out against the dark blue sky like it is right now. I swear I saw colors.
Natty: Well, I believe you! You should definitely journal about this. Have you journaled about this?
Jake: No, not yet. I guess I should, shouldn't I?
Natty: Yeah, it’s awesome. Get it down. (Not asking why or how this is possible. She just affirms that I saw full and vibrant colors)
Jake: Maybe I will connect it with how awareness is important to seeing color. How color and color nuisance can be overlooked 9.9 times out of 10 because we are so distracted all the time by constant inputs and stimulus. Maybe I will say something like, ‘without awareness life becomes dull in color’ or ‘with awareness I once was colorblind but now I see’.Natty: I like it.
Jake: Ah. I don’t know. It’s kinda cheesy.